Eyes That Only See Sorrow

Living a life one motel room at a time

Crying for food but not the kind for mouths

Hungry for love, the love we all crave

One man enters and one man leaves

Carting around this child like she's just one more thing

Just another hassel it's surprising how much you do care

A little girl shouldn't have to see her mother like this

Under the body of a new 'John' every night

Every night hoping that daddy will come back

As these men never turn out to be her long gone hero

Beaten down and spat upon

Treated like a dog they don't even know of her exsistence

Hidding in a closet amongst all the horror

Seeing all the motions, a corruption takes place

Stealing the youth and innocence of a young mind

Watching as mommy gets rapped over and over again

For a few dollars so that she can eat shit the next day

Sweat stained sheets cover itchy little legs when they've gone

Longing whole heatedly for someone to care

Just to show up and take her away

Away from all the madness that follows like a stalker

Like all the men who come and make her mother moan

Crying out like some sort of beast

She doesn't know it but inside her mother is really crying

Faking the motion is a metaphor for her reality

These eyes of a child that only know sorrow

She's never had a christmas or gone to disneyland

Locked away in a rat hole for all her life

Never learning a thing of the world only of its pain

How men can be so cruel and life so unforgiving

Breaking hearts are now numb to all sensation

As love was never there and never will be

The innocence inside this childs soul is lost forever

Never to return like the parts of her mother she threw away

Only caring to make enough to live one more day

The drugs and empty bottles begin to add up

Pushing mommy to wake up and pull down her skirt

How could you put a child through this nightmare?

Seeing it over and over she is now food for the wolves

As bad dreams sneek in and snatch her joy away

Such a sad sad story for such a small small girl

Throw away your dollies now it's time to go again

A brand new city with the same old diseases

Caught in a web of perversion it won't be long now

Until this little girl grows up to be just as her life bringer

Another whore in a world of sick infatuations

Burn this stinch away as no one cares for the consequences

Alone like all those nights were she saw too much

The pain remains forever as there is no one there

Solitude is your enemy as you now take on one man at a time

Giving your life away like it doesn't matter

You don't see how beautiful you really are

So these eyes that only saw sorrow will only see more

As the circle of abuse continues, and the sin lingers on

Guilty

Aching hearts burst open inside our chests

Breaking bones snap through the skin

Purple and black marks form on my face

Bruised from the beatings

The lashing of your fucking forked tongue

A devil dressed as a servant of authority

I am the one made to carry the burdens not you

Walking on my own I look in the mirror to find

The verdict still isn't lifted and I am guilty

Marked as the beast of all mankind

Waisting away, my damnation is yet to come about

Flying into new arms now

Looking for the love that was never there when I asked

False hope springs up like evaporated water in the heat

A sun of eternal witness bears down on my back
Baking me alive I cry out just to be struck down

Kill me now and let me go, I no longer wish to live

Depressing the life from me the darkness covers my eyes

Create for me a new star, one to guide me home

Yet living in a time where I am distant

I don't even know who I was made to be

Going back and covering my tracks

Now I will never return to the man I once was

Lost in a forrest for a million years

Caught up in the glitter of fairies of fireflys

Finally finding some rest in the bosom of the wretched

I am guilty, just as guilty as the next man

Unable to remove myself from temptation

Does this not make me a man since I fall like them all?

Over and over am I the only one with this problem?

So free the three, the secret things of my heart

Love joy and peace, things that I wish to meet

Locked forever to hate malice and lust

How do I break the chains that keep me bogged down?

Do you see it written all over my face

The lies that I told and put in your place

Covered in the shame now of every dirty thing

Cleanse me by the blade and bring about my death

A furry in the earth from destroying her own new birth

Open up and swallow me as I pass from this place to new life

Hope that is fated with fire, the future I look forward to

Now I will render to Ceaser what is Ceaser's

And to death what is death's

Take me away in the eternal chains, I don't deserve to wash my face

Keep the dust packed on tight so all will know

That this is my penality, don't ever live like this

Sad Song Lullaby (The God I Would Be)

Chared and smoking children lay lifeless on on dead mothers

Resting upon their chests no movement is found

These are the images that the child within me sees

Filled with anguish these scenes only play out horror

Dark figures dressed in white come to bring us home

Wailing into the night a sad song rocking the dead to sleep

So let the boy take the royal seat for once

Allow him to hold the scepter and cast out demands

For once we would have a ruler with compassion

And yet the iron fist of judgement would hold true

Cast now your crowns before thee and be set free

Give over you life and I will give you a new list of dreams

Things that are impossible to see but dwell all around us

I will show you now what kind of God I would be

Greatest of all the nations, a king among thieves

Humbly approach me with boldness in your tone

So I may look into your heart and know you're truely mine

A creation of another yet so deadfast in following my lead

But the murders still go on outside the palace walls

Seeing this, war will be conducted in a righteous way

The hammer of peace will fall after the wicked are slain

Lighting their bodies on fire we will use them to light the way

Lord of all who love me now, I am held up high

Not by guilt or that I would kill those who stood against me

But because I first showed a love that no one ever expected

Now as the blood runs black in the streets of madness

All will rise up in one voice and one heart

Long live the child king, long live the love he brings

Anointed now these people are for I am theirs and they are mine

A complex of perfection takes over as their minds dwell on me

Someone who came from nothing to set them all free

Even as the sad songs continue, at least look at one thing

Focus on what kind of ruler I would be

The kind that every servant would want to be in love with

Teach now this world to love and you've taught them to live

For by love we will conquer all, and there will be no more sad songs

The Caretaker

Open up your heart and let it all fall out

A work in progress I don't know where to start

Healing hands press through the dirt

In order to get to the beginning

To the child lost in all the parental junk

Learning of the life that I was made to embark

Clinching hands with a king and a beast

To follow a little boy who is lost in the dark

Creating a better me and helping me to love myself

Showing that it is alright for me to play the part

Caring when no one else gave a fuck

My caretaker, the one I write about

Pouring out my heart alone in the dark

Hoping that she will know of the pain I've felt

That which I let go and that which remains

My dear dear Theresa, you took a work in progress

Continuing the formations of a master

And putting it all into good work

This is not goodbye but only thank you

For giving me the drive and hope to keep on thinking

And writing it out in a way that is all my own

..................................................................................................

Dedicated to someone who always saves my life

You know who you are

This Should Be A Good One

Kissing a ghost I fall to the hands of emptiness
Fiction becomes reality as you put the fish hooks in me
Ripping out my guts with a fucking rusty knife
Stabbing me in the back everytime I've said 'enough'
No more for me these stories just keep getting worse
Taking a little from here and a little from there
I've seen that I have a right to vengence
And I will fight for what is mine, for what is right
Killing in the name of everything this is pure and light
A variety of damage is caused when I walk in the night
Calling out the names of all those who hate me
I walk quiet and carry a big stick
Big enough to crush your fucking head for all your bullshit
For the sins you committed and then passed to me
When you held my hand and told me it was all alright
Then turned me around and put the gun to my back
Why not do it in the front, so I can see your eyes when I die
In order that I will wake up and remember that last moment
When my last breath entered and the sweat began to fall
An open ending to this mystery, am I alive or just breathing?
So take your hands out of my mouth
My teeth are tired of bitting down on this wretched ash
Set the world ablaze so that I may waste away
Returning to where I came from, the land of the dead
Free me from this prison, this body I call my own
Lost to the meanings of time, I'm feeling optimistic about this one
So if hope dies then what do we have left to look to?
I once held out that all could be made right
But I soon was put in my place and laid back to die
Watching from a burning second story window the sun rise
With death rays made in black tears and acidic thoughts
Children now dream of when they can wake up to heat
So cold and lost inside the ambitions of the world have died
Having seen what I've seen they just don't have the stomach for it
Yet I was there, the day that the sky turned red
Black clouds poured out their sorrows and we all praised
For the end was near, but it was only the beginning
A continuing of our hardships and mine most of all
Suffering under the weight of all who came to my helping hand
Sometimes I wish to know if I am blessed or cursed
If my chaos is lucky and my woe made to shine as bliss
Make way here comes a new day one that I have made
Just for me out of magic markers and ink pins
Tattooed on every soul that evil spirits all dwell within us
Not thinking what I'm thinking well then that's just not right
Time will go on with or without you and the earth will spin
Around and around it will go, straight into the end of time
So now the masses cry out and one mass is held
Making them all think that a simple man can atone them all
Cover your eyes as the dead make a pledge
To decode a truth that was standing pure before their eyes
Fucking up once again I see this world going straight to hell
But not with me I did that trip
Never to return, they made me a highpriest of that place
Ask me the way and I will show you the path
I know the hidden things, everything of the dark
The agony scene breaks out and boils begin to form
Overtaking the clean, the lost gather weapons in order to fight
Look at this story and say it isn't coming true
A new genre of hate is being played out and no one will know
That the thought it took to create a world such as this was so tough
Having to go through all the things I speak of just to make it right
Beautifying a broken heart in order to bring about a work of art
This should be a good one everybody
So sit back and enjoy as your mind begins to rot
Gather around the horror laid out in plan sight
And the scary thing is, is that this is my life

Less Talk More Blood

I'm so so tired, ready to waste away

Tired of your bullshit and your talk

Fucking giving every lame-ass excuse in the book

I've heard this story so many times before

Over and over I wonder when it will end

Come on now lets get to the finish

How about we change the world and make it about me

About my say and the things that I want

When I say die you flop dead

And when I say live you pop up again

Sons and daughters would soon rule this land

In which parents would become our slaves

Guardens of children are now like dogs

Beneath the feet of their master

Gentle to pet and qucik to scorn

And in this the world it wouldn't be so different

Just the ages of the tyrants would be reversed

Sometimes I wake up and just wish to kill you

To break your necks while you sleep

Ripping you open with my bare hands

And watching as your bowels fall out

Less talk now and more blood

I love it when I see you, the old, fall down

You speak down to me and now you're there

The same place that you put me

Not even caring how you hurt me over and over again

It doesn't matter until you are in the same fucking place

Watch as I break down these dredful walls

And let the sand of my affliction pour in

Covering you in a pile of rubble

In the same way that your words covered my soul

Leaving me with nothing, now I grow old

Before my time I have opened my own coffin

The eyes of death are no upon me

As you were the ones who always broke my heart

Somethings can only be healed so many times

So I wish to bring you there, the place before death

The step between a prayer and a nightmare

Where tears are born and rage begins to bloom

A union none of us asked for

We look back and wonder why any of this is happening

This life we hold to now is as nothing

Rotting to the sound of clapping

You fucking bastard just keep pushing more out

Motherfuckers with arms linked

It makes me laugh since you hate eachother with such ease

But even easier is the fact that you hate me most of all

Fucking me over time and again

When will all this bullshit end

Lets get the ball rolling and the blood flowing

I'm in the mood for a kill and you are victim number 5

For I've already put four in the grave

The countdown is now beginning

First was me, when I put myself off

Next was the memories I hated to keep

After that I had to kill myself again for I came back

Then it was all the bitchs who stole my heart, all in one grave

Now it's you, the birthright creaters, my flesh and blood

The makers of so much of why I hate

Ruining my fucking life so many times

Running over my face with your lies

I wish to kill again and now is the time

What Is There Without Love?

The fear is what keeps us here

Ponding the unthinkable and seeing dark things

You say I worship the devil

Yet it is the furthest thing from the truth

Where are you without love?

A pit of rotting desires and passions

Now with the truth coming to light

We see that it is not so beautiful afterall

So empty and cold inside

Your eyes turn inside out just to watch your soul go

Flying to a place where freedom sours

And with less we are forced to die

Washing our hands as Pilate

Passing the sin to another place and time

But the craving for blood remains

Making a home in the heart of the stupified wise

Those who say they have wisdom yet own nothing

To call yourself to be above the world

Is different from really being there

Without love to see the pain of other

How is it that you survive?

With faith to move mountains

And to hear the trumpets sound

You turn away those that need you

The very souls craving to be loved above else

Lets Make This One About Me

Lost to feelings I don't understand

Seeing a place and a time I just don't get

Out of my reach and out of my grasp

But so close in my sight that it hurts

A pain that just won't go away

For the first time in a while I will look in

Inward towards my heart and wonder how

How it is I can live the way I do

Carrying so much of the things I hate

So shall we dance, me and my murderer?

Dressed in shame and scorn you look so beautiful

My eyes are filled with fire as you pass the guilt

Around the table we feast of the dead

A sign of what you wish of me to be

Holding hands we waltz to a sad song

Played by the dead who see with unseeing eyes

You reach out of the past to take a bite from my heart

Writing this out to you and you contact me

Hitting me like a brick to the face I now wish to die

Wanting so badly to be with and without you

I know where my heart remains

In the same place that you put it the night you left

So many times I wanted to cry

I knew that it was all an attack to bring me to my knees

I'm breaking deep down inside and I wonder why

You have this hold on me, why the fuck why?

My life must be about me, no one but me

Trying to speak out my words and thoughts but they have died

All before they hit my tongue that passed on by

Bury me alive now so that I may go too

Lock the gate and watch me burn behind the irons

Sometimes the joy of my memories kills me

It's funny how life happens when you don't expect it

So this one was finally about me

And it hit me so hard that I think I will waste away

Options...Live Or Die

Scum fills the earth and we are made to see

That everything is alright, that we will all get by

Nothing is what it seems anymore

Everything has been made to look right

It is all a lie, a mark of shame on a face of beauty

True friends are hard to come by and family even harder

Lost to the suffocation of time they all melt away

Fire fills the sky as we are now forced to die

A death by hallucination, transfixed by horror

The terror that plays out before our very eyes

We slaughter our enemier then turn our hand on ourselves

This place that once held peace now smells of war

As blood and ash are all that remain in our minds

Crumbling to an end the apocalyptic era has come

The moon turns to blood and the sun fleds the air

Stars fall from the heavens and the earth shall mourn

Run and hide or stand and fight it's up to you

Don't be the one who is caught without a side

I've shown the way for I have seen the outcome

Encamped around us now are those who wish to end is all

Sleeping with eyes open and swords in hand

At a moments notice they will awaken our sleeping souls

Now is the day where we must unlock our secrete weapon

The giant that lives within out hearts

So pick the way that you want to go

Standing on your feet or hiding from the storm

Either way, you won't live forever, no is the time for war

To win back our brothers who were taken into the night

Solitude is not the answer, and meditating won't help

Action is the only action we have that will do something

Open up the doors and take the guns out

For every crisis faced is another crisis finished

Walk now with me the man who's seen it all before

Prepare yourself so that your bowels may not fall

As the love I have for you I feel in my very bones

Wanting to keep you safe means that you will have to fight

Challenging the ways of the world around us

So left with two options which will you choose

Live or die, the only two things we truely have in life

All Shall Perish Yet All Shall Live

Walking alone on a path that has been beaten down

Broken in by the feet of millions of souls

The road always travled, that of life

Leading to the same place, a pit filled with hate

A hate for being there, for even having it made

Hate that knows no end and that will never stop

Every soul to ever take life will one day cease

Hearts will stop and the chest of fate will no longer rise

Paint on faces in coffins to make them smile

Yet under the covers hides a person in terror

Living on in a place that we cannot know

I know of the land of pitty for I used to live there

A resident of hell fire, brimestone was my only friend

Now back with a new knowledge I am ready to set you free

All you have to do is ask and I'll give you the key

Malice and rage once held my hands that now hold yours

Look in my eyes and fly away, above the corruption

Never ending wars are fought on these battlefields

Riddled in the bones of victims who still scream for help

And no one comes, all the help has gone

It came in the first life, and they threw it away

Those like me who came with the answer

The very ones that you picked up and cursed to our faces

Now you know that I was always right from the beginning

Marching now as one of the eternal dead you wish it was different

That you listened to me, and made me your loving master

Tears won't bring about mercy only a harsher beating

Devils hold the reigns to your life now as you pass away

Going deeper into the darkness that has no end

For the hole only gets deeper the longer you fall

Lucky for you I was one who hit the bottom

That stopped the chain from continuing to grow

Hailing in a new generation, one without fear

Writing poetry that was stolen from the walls of prisons

I saw the faces of angels being destroied and they loved it

Taking it all in, I see the same spirit in your eyes

Loving your end for your ignorances has made you blind

And it breaks my heart to see you laugh as you die

This is the last time and this is the last goodbye

Over and over we try to work this out

And all this time all I wanted was you

But I can't have the things in life that don't belong to me

You will perish like the rest of the world

Unless you reach out and hold to me, an anchor in the blue

Don't let this place swallow you whole

Wake up and reach for the sky to be lifted to safety

I am the living sacrifice, use my blood as the learning curve

Concieved in fire I know the face of damnation

You will die, but that won't be the end

Give way to my way, the way that can save you forever

It's A Chug Chug Breakdown

Beatdown and hurt from the poundings

We see the faces of broken mothers in our hearts

Dreaming the dreams of broken homes

Sons and daughters wake up to find that it is no dream

Swinging away at the world like you could kill them all

Pick your death and pick your poision

Choose your weapon and sharpon it unto deadly touches

Reach for the sky and while your up grab the stars

Words now fire out like lightening

As bullets scream by and pierce our deepest parts

Speak the truth for it is a lie to say it hurts

With its weight now off your chest

Finally being able to breath

Nightmares take their place and fall to darkened fires

A place where memories we don't want to keep go

Screeching for the pain to stop we don't hear their cries

Going into the night like a cloaked figure in the swamp

Darkness has the last laugh with nature behind that

Abandoned by those who say they love us

We breakdown in a puddle of waste and go away

Part now for me the sea of lost souls

People forgotten by the ones who said they never would

With their fake faces of halfway caring

Now wake me everyday and tell me I don't know what's in my heart

Tell me what it is I really think and what I really dream

Take back all the lies you've ever told and beg I forgive you

Fire falls on the heads of those who are just like thee

Foreigners in my promise land telling me what's what

My heart is free and my soul is pure

Don't preach to me, I know exactly the meanings of right and wrong

So when a child is born in bodom I will speak life

The same as if a child is born in heavenly heights

For all deserve a chance, a chance you left me without

But I took back what was truely mine

Laugh your last as my justice comes about

Look now as the weight throne has already be laid out

Judgement falls on the wicked and redemption on the chosen lot

Father of lies and mother of sin, bow down before your son

A son of a living one, greater then your master, death

As my heart has reached a new place, a place you'll never go

Death Blooms

The new rose of sharon grows in the field

A beauty among flowers springs to life

Covered red in the blood of sacrifices

Turning blue by the worlds cold touch

Sending life to death quicker then can be said

Spoken to the wind like nothing is the matter

Death blooms in the valley where haunted souls dwell

Lost to the bastards of time

Fatherless children room without hope

Without anything in sight, just agony

Waking up to a new day of the same old torture

Come home to me now child and find rest

Look in my eyes and begin to see the light

The light of old that lives in all new creations

You have the ability now reach out and grab it

It's waiting for you to take it my the hand

Make everyday yours and never let go

Watch as the stars turn black to mix with the sky

Falling now a purple strain, a stain on the heavens

Silver fish and golden rays spread joy on young faces

Ignorant to what true pain really is

Not ever knowing what real loss is all about

A sadist nation is groomed out of future despire

They see the turning tide and decide not to run

Making the old sins their own and sticking to them

Ready to spread the disease to another generation

Will one rise above the clouds to show a new way?

Monsters and demons become the idols we worship

Without having to change their apperence

All bow down to ugliness and don't even think twice

Blinded eyes only grow darker as the world falls apart

A masterbation of the mind occures as we force peace

Orgasmic breaths are breathed in as a false hope embraces us

Only when it's too late will we see that this is our darkest hour

Changing one is the start, a beginning to change them all

That hope is out there, all we must do is love ourselves

Love the start and then love the end

Move forward in uplifting yourself and then go to your brother

Don't fake the smile you press on when you wake up

Only a perfect flower will last forever and no two are the same

What is the standard for perfection if we have never seen it?

Make the perfect state of mind your one and only desire

To set the bar as high as you want and never reget and look back

Maked by scars and skeletons we unlock the unseen

Hoping that if we live out problems they will go away

Only feeding the dogs of war without our knowing

The curse on our souls grows stronger

Freedom slips into the night to be rapped by false realities

There is hope and there is peace but not from the source

This well of living life like nothing is wrong has run dry

Walk the path I have blazed before you

Eat now from the tree of life that will never die

No longer allow yourself to be force-fed by the radical ones

Those who say that you must always be what they want it to be

Unlach the door and walk in the footprints of the elders

People like me who have been brought back from the dead

And let the formerly living minister to your heart

As they have seen the unseen and know the unknowable

Watch now as the season's change and death begins to bloom

Will you beat the beast or will you face the blade?

It's all up to you how you live, now I say choose to live

Too Many Thoughts For Simple Words

Explaining the reasons behind the questions

Lost without words and inslaved to apathy

Empty eyes backed by empty hearts stare back

Stars fall from the heavens as I fall fast asleep

Dreaming dreams of better things

My life comes apart in my moments of joy

Releasing myself to be who I must be

Don't kill the things of me that make me real

Reality to me is something that I have just seen

That I can be great without having to stand out

Thinking of everything that I can have now

And holding them all with a humble hand

Placing my head in a vice and twisting it off

My mind can only handle more then what is normal

No more no less nothing inbetween

Fighting back my rage I think what the real me would do

Would he fight and would he steal back the moments to make it real?

Drink for me now the blood of my enemies

Those who share in my life force

The ones who passed on the essence of who I am

I took what they gave and ripped it to pieces

Taking the things I wanted and added my own

Thinking of all the times that I saw myself the mirror image of you

A murderer and an adulterer lost to the pits of hell

Now the taste in my mouth is metalic

As a bear trap has been placed inside my head

With every new thought comes a new disaster

And with all the new dreams come the dogs of terror

Being swept away under the rug for no one to see

I become the man that I want to be

Wither you like it or not

So pull harder on the strings of your martyr

I will not be your little puppet any longer

See the scars, see the pain, simple words can't say it all

Becoming the very thing that I hate I take the mask off

Now tear it down and stomp it out, the fire of your lies

Just stay the iceangel you always seemed to be

Sometimes in life you have to kill your friends to save your enemies

Turning the other check to let your family slap you

Shoving on the scorn and the shame, I will not be held down

Making my life one day at a time, let it be mine

I'll hold true to it all, even the mistakes

As I pull the trigger which the sky fall away

Making the world mine, just the way I intend it to be

Trauma overwhelmes this world of mine and I won't take it

Throwing it all away just to see the look on your face

Nevermore will you hold me as your own

Blood of my blood and flesh of my flesh

In your creation you set a hope in a dying soul

Without knowing it I woke up to a dream that I had to live

I was always going to be better then you from the beginning

Hearing the end of it one day soon when my aspirations overtake you

So hear come the scissors to cut the chord

And I won't bleed out, and nothing will be lost

But I am not a baby feeding off your lias any longer

To be a man is to be set free and today I am that man

The Quick and The Dead

Running away from all of my fears

A remnat of my old self remains

Burning a whole stright through my soul

Blood pours out and I fall about

Trying to hold myself up right

Walking the destined determined path

The quick walk by as nothing is the matter

And the dead stare back in order to obtain power

Lost to the grasps of time

I will forever be in my own eternity

Made from memories and late night kisses

Feelings of being weighed down return

Covered in hope and dressed in joy

Sometimes the good things don't turn out that way

Carved from stone my heart is just so old

Living lifetimes not meant to be seen

Being the good shepard is not all it's made to be

Sweat drips down and it looks of blood

Smelling of ash and tasting of death

The victim is the one that can't get up again

But I am up and I am here to stay

By the side of faith forever

My demise and blessing in disguise

Play The Role

Do it well, what you set your mind to

Wake up and stretch and take in the day

Don't waste away becoming nothing

Just take a step and raise your voice

Proclaim who you are and lift your head

Walk with pride just for a day

Standing in the shoes of those who oppressed you

Play the part and play it well

Become the role and turn into that character

That person that lays deep inside your chest

Waiting to come about, wait to make the scene

Do it the way that you know how

It's a riskey business walking out your frontdoor

But take the chance and live your life

It only comes once in forever so make it right

Stop hidding in the shadows, come into the light

Be yourself, the true self that lives inside

Let your smile shine and stand on high

On the highest mountain make your way

Tell the world that kept you down, no more

Breakdown the walls everyone built to keep you in

Show them that no matter what you will be free

In this life or the next you will know liberty

Make the cut but not by them but by yourself

Set the bar and jumb over by leaps and bounds

For the days of being caged are dead and gone

Now is the time to live the life that you make

So pick up your sword and march forward in war

Wrap yourself in truth and wage revenge on the world

Keep it coming don't ever stop

Just as they would, if you had never gotten out

Ready, lights, camera, action

Rolling now is the movie of your life

You wrote the title now play the role

A Tear Sheds

Dark circles form under bright blue eyes

Streaks from tears exist to tarnish beauty

Hitting her over and over again

She cries out and you won't stop

Ravaging her time and time again

There is something sick about this

Yet you don't seem to see it

You've stolen the life of an innocent one

The very ones I have come to protect

Risen from the dead the cries of a child ring out

My ears pick up the sent of a missing soul

One tear falls for everytime shes been rapped

And now she stands in a puddle of her own waste

How could you do this?

How could you be such a fucking monster?

Well here I come to take back what was lost

To destroy your very soul and burn you where you stand

I'll fucking end you bastard and you'll never come back

You will never touch what is not to be seen

You've perverted her whole being and so much will be lost

There will never be an ability to love anymore

And it makes me sick that I wish to vomit

Grabbing and pulling and sticking and pushing

Motherfucker I hate all of your fucking kind

Soft kisses and embraces were never there

Ruining her fucking life over and over again

Turning friendship to loss and forgiveness to pitty

Guilt remains with her as she feels it's her fault

I swear I will kill you I swear on my life

Give me back the soul of that child as I crush yours

Fuck you asshole, fuck you with the deepest of hate

You destroied a little girl and never thought twice

Hatred is only a glimpse of how I feel for you

Her heart has now been sewn shut forever

Never to be opened by those who so want to love her

Bringing corruption to her mind I wish to slay you

No more tears will fall as long as I'm around

No more molestation and no more evil grins

Think quick as I've got the gun to your head

Remember all the times you did the same to a child

Shake for me now as they shoke underneath you

Watching them choke to breath you froze them in time

Motherfucker here I am to kill you here I am to make it all right

I will unleash a new terror over you

Beating you into submission and then into death

Sending you into eternal damnation

Never waiting for you to repent

For there is no salvation for a sin like this

So die motherfucker die die die

I crave to cut your fucking heart out

Watch now as the souls of the innocent come back to haunt you

Tearing you apart I stand and allow you to come undone

Just like you did to them motherfucker, it all comes back in the end

Bitting you where it hurts I smile as you bleed

You're pretty fucked up now, the same thing you though of them

Beautiful little girls that you took the unthinkable from

And after I shed my tears for them

I will be right there coming after you

Ready for the fight to begin, I know I am

Time to die motherfucker, time to rot in hell

Devil Driver

Judgement day comes with an unseen furry

Wrath is poured out with a horrible force

The hammer falls not by the power of my arm

But by the piercing of my lips

A speech so harsh and reasonable

That the heads of the worlds spin and snap

Breaking off at the bone and falling to collapse

The skys turn black and then to red

A great calm before the storm to purify the land

Getting rid of the oder of the dead

Washing away the remains of my enemies

All because I spoke my mind

Because I was able to stand when they all fell

Darkness takes a hold and everyone now knows

That I drive the devil with my own whip

Created by my blood sweat and tears

He will return to dust and the demons will all be mine

For so long they came to me

Now returning to hell I can gather up my legions

Prepare for war now for the end is near

The ocean will now meet the Sinai

As the sun departs from the sky sending a cold wind

Ash fills the sky and blood rains down

This is the sign of the man who comes to take control

I am the master now and there is no getting out

Unleashed from my cage this was your last mistake

Anger at its puriest form now take a toll

Causing pain and anguish they all will see now

That you don't mess with a man with a mind such as I

For revenge is what I seek and it is what I get

This king will become a tyrant and slay every last one

Every prick that talked back when they knew I was right

Hold back the day that you lay dying in the snow

Covered in blood and frost you freeze for it is the content of your heart

Cold and alone I now allow you to meet your maker

And before you died you looked into his eyes

As I say goodbye you wretched son of mine

We lived a thousand life times and now they are all gone

I'll meet you one day soon as I stand above you in the lake of fire

I loved to hate you and now I can love myself

For in myself I can find all things, that I have all victory

Even over death as I have been resurrected to dish out havoc

Listen now as my master plan comes about

The dogs of war are howling as they lay at my feet

Attack is on the horrizon and it will be swift

You'll never know what hit you even after I have left

Satan in my son and he who has the ears let him hear

That you've only seen the work of a child

My evil is so much more worse

Now you will all be even worse off

There is no hope or peace or joy

I've taken these things out so that only sorrow will stick

Driving the world straight into the ground I cry out

This is what you get for making me like this

Haste The Day

With speed move through the night

Defending the innocent and saving the lost

Crying out as one in the wilderness

When will this worthless war be stopped?

Been away for far too long

When will the one I love come and return home?

Falling down everyday

But now I know to get back up again

Doomsday devices are now strapped to my sides

Ending all that come to end me

Drawing the faster gun and watching the bulliets fly

Taking everything back that belonged to me once

I'll hold it forever and make sure that no tears fall

For once in a life long ago they fell day and night

But not anymore since I stole my heart back

With a kiss from an angel my life came running back

Now I'll kill every last one of you who get in my way

The return of the king has come and he's back with furry

Not sitting around playing with his thumbs

He is out for action and to claim your head

Victory is the only way to get him to rest

Battle will now be waged day and night as you stay in sight

My swords are sharpened and my spears are strong

Slaying the wicked who come to take life

Time is growing short as we see the demons come about

So in a breath I take your life and gain mine back

Make haste ye men of waring tribes

Now is the time now is the day now is when blood exsists

Soaking into the ground fallen spirits speak out

Evil and good take hand to take the world back

Back for themselves, back for why creation came to pass

And I will stand on the side of grey

Both righteous and wicked, making my own fight now

For this is the day I have been chosen to be set apart

The high priest of a new order

Pure angelic anger and wrath wrapped in sorrow

So as I put you in the grave I shed a single tear

Wishing that you and I could have stood together

Today is the day of tragedy and defeat

But also the day I will stand upon my own two feet

I am the spirit that makes you move

Come now all you who think as I do

And lets make this world ours

Kissing Myself Goodbye

Remembering all the times gone past

Over and over reliving them in my mind

Calling out for someone to save me

To take this load off my back

And hold me in the safety of loving arms

Finally I got this and finally I'm real

Real and alive ready to show the world what I've got

Putting my worry to rest and ending the hatred of my flesh

Crucifying my flesh daily and tucking it in bed

So as it lays between the sheets and falls asleep

I can light the bed on fire and watch the death of me

All the parts I hate and don't want attached to thee

A king among simpletons, the bulliets bounce off of me

Gaining so much now that I walk with open eyes

With open arms and smiles from those who love

Away from those who only wanted me in hell

I've left all those fuckers behind and said goodbye

With a flip of a finger and a snap of my head

I say good ridens to all of you, and I won't see you in hell

For I am above the death of the meek

Only the weak walk below me for all are not as me

With pride and a chest puffed out high

I kissed myself goodbye and left all the crap behind

To death with my blacked soul and my bruised spirit

My heart has been renewed by someone you wish you knew

The chocking on my words has stopped and I've been unlocked

Set free to blaze a new trail in the path of my life

The time has come and I took the reigns back

I am me and that's all I can be

The best is me as me and nothing inbetween

Looking Forward

Tired of the past I've left it all behind

Seeing the tears that fell

And that hearts left scattered on the floor

Won't you just pick me up?

Carry me on your back and take me on?

On and on into the light and past the dark

Who knows where I am to go

For if I do not know who else would?

Walking half blind and almost deaf

The darkness is so erie

And the silence, deafening

So get the fuck back as I look around

Taking in all I am and all that's surrounds me

Making this life mine for the first time

I have to look forward and not fall back

The future is almost bright and almost black

Shadows made by blood and hope

Where dreams are made and inspirations crushed

Demons and angels walk the same streets introducing themselves

Is there no evil in a time you can't see?

Or is there good in a place where there is nothing at all?

I can make this land of my heart whatever I wish

Never to be locked behind the bars infront of my soul again

Set free by the evolution of my mind

I took a step up from the gutters of disillusion

And into the lime light of me being the best I can be

Doing all I do for me and only for me

I look forward to the time when I get to share the mystery

Then you will see that I was always right

And you, like before, were always wrong

.......................................................................

This life is mine and you will never take it away!

Self

Created from dirt I now become a stone

The rock on which all your heads will fall

Made to be like this before the stars were formed

I am the greatest of all before me

A king who sits upon a royal throne

Back from the deepths the ruler regains control

Making the coward tremble and the self righteous bow low

So put on me my crown and hand me the scepter

For once I was nothing till one in greatness found me

An embrace, a kiss, and so much more

The lord of self awakened and did so in my soul

Now the anger is perfected and the rage complete

I have all the right to destroy all those who stood before

Who told me I was weak and that I was nothing at all

Foolish words as I rehear them in my dreams

Now I cut down the fool who tries to take my throne

My life is mine now and with it my soul can now rejoice

I have my whole true self back due something I forever yearned for

No more lies and no more self degradation

Purity has run its course and indulgence can now take hold

Good enough is nothing now that I'm the best there ever was

Things Do Work Out...I Hope

The night I was there looking in your eyes

I could see the sorrow and the pain

Joy filled the cracks of your boundry

And hope glowed from the top

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

But my eyes are filled with the beauty of your presence

Talking again and again

Drawing closer to something I don't understand

How you could even enjoy speaking to me

Worthy is not a word I ever knew for my life

Yet you take the time to know who I am

So I hope it all works out

I hope that the rest of my dreams will work out

Dreaming those dreams night and day

Will you be the one to make the dreams come about?

Your smile makes me smile

And your voice is like a song I never want to end

I'm trying so hard to be special just for you to see

That I am worth it for once in forever

So stand here with me and watch the sky turn bright

From darkness to light just like my life

Once I was lost and now I am found

But now I yearn to be found in your arms of love

Let the things that hold you back pass away

For I too had to throw away all the burdens I once held

To be with you would be a miracle and a great one at that

So I'm trying to find my whole self to give it to you

Now shine your light on me so my shadows run to graves

Built by my hands for a time just like this

When the greatest of a creation
Would walk here next time me

So Far Away And Dying When I Want You In My Arms

This pain in my heart

It seems like the days change my moods

Like darkness and light they switch

I talk to you on the phone

So much love passed between the chords

Over miles and miles smiles were formed

Now you call to say that something's wrong

You're dying and no one knows why

Hurting and afraid you've made your peace

But my peace will not be found

My only wish was to have you forever

And now you may be gone forever

So forever and ever I will miss you

Now I'm dying to be with you before you go

I don't want you to leave, you're the only one that knows

Knows about me, about what I really care about

The only thing I need now is you

As I sit here crying, ripping my heart out

Wondering why we are so far apart

I yearn to see you when I sleep

But not from heavens gates

Let me hold you in my arms and make it all alright

Don't die without seeing me face to face

I so wish to kiss away your tears

And I know when I do my own will fall

No one understands the pain that I walk through

For in your time of struggle I fall with you

Please live so I may dance with you

While you wear a dress made of white

My very best friend, don't go away like this

Don't be afraid and don't be sick

I will always be here to stand by your side

In sickness and in health I will always love you

And all because you saw me, the me that I am without

Come home to me my love

Stay forever so that I may look in your eyes

I'm afraid that when you go my heart will break

And I'll be alone forever, gone from you and it hurts

Let me come and be with you, let me sleep in your grave

If you go I go and I don't want you to go

Lay with me here in the world where we can have paradise

Heaven is now in your eyes and I hate it

Don't steal my heart if you go away

Let me love you here forever, never to let you go

Dreaming Dreams Of Mary And Me

A lightness forms in the deepths of my heart

One look at you and I forget the world I knew

So so beautiful I just wish to look at you

And anything more would be the end of me

To hold your hand or play with your hair

This would put me to in a sleep that I could never awake from

Yes I think that I love you, from the first moment I saw you

The first and the last time

I didn't need to know anything more then this

Your eyes have fire, for they reflect your soul

As I sit and think of what it would be like to give you a kiss

Crossing over now into another world

Somewhere between alive and asleep

Dreaming dreams of you, my wonderful Mary

But I know that the reality of it all,

Is that my dreams will only remain dreams

You're too beautiful, even your faults are perfect

Guys like me don't get to be with girls like you

Though if you let me I could look at you forever

For once again I can feel my heart beat

When I close my eyes and have you here

To be mine forever this would end it all for me

So I will just keep them dreams

For your love would kill me, because of one thing

You are the one thing I can truly say I need

A Drink Laced With Sin

Sit back and begin to flex

Show the world who they're messin with

Just a guy with a gun at his side

A knife in his hand and a grande outside

Throwing you all off the face of the earth

He walks with spurs like a western hero of pasts lifes

Cowboy hats and whiskey bottles fly across the sky

Now that the dancing girls twinkle like shinning stars

So one drink goes back and another down

Slam the glass to the table and begin again

But when your eyelides shut and the nightmares come

You see me standing there holding the guns

One bullet in your head and one in the gut

First you stop thinking then your bowels fall out

Metaphores form as you lay dying

You have to stop thinking in order for truth to come out

Passed out on the floor in a dirth bathhouse stall

Dreams of fire and brimstone fill you again

Filling you up you feel the heat

The sins of your fathers have been placed on your shoulders

So drink up the liquer of you regret

Black fluid from your head to your feet

Spill it out and you are killed in disgust

No one wants to set a table for a sinner as such

The stones have been thrown yet you hold out

Truth has now passed and only lies slip past

Past the ears of wreched men who hate you

Not willing to take it anymore

I look in there eyes and see in each a part of myself

Break the liar in half and begin to live your own life

Almost the same and yet so far apart

Alcoholic stupers suddenly let the beans fall out

So it takes posion to get you to truely sobbered up

Nothing but a waisted life, how do you live with yourself?

Get back on your horse and ride into the night

Out of my hair and out of my sight

And forever out of my life

The War Fighter

A war of many fronts is hard to come by

Not just one enemy but all as enemies

Each person carries a different weapon

But the pain that's caused is all the same

One bitch that won't let up

And another that won't shut the fuck up

Stuck in legalism and the other in guilt

Who has the greater sin when it comes to my life?

Wishing to be left alone they won't go away

Fucking me over again and again

One on purpose and the other without knowing

And just the same there is always some fucker

Standing there trying to knock me out

Judging my character like I'm the book under the cover

I stone bastards like you who won't speak of truth

Looking at me and still able to tell lies

I'm a fucking war fighter and I've looked death in the eye

Scared of nothing and afraid of all

Walking through this world with clenched fists

And holding true to the gun on my hip

Swords and arrows come and missels fire from yonder paths

But I am the one that controls the most important thing

My mind will never be taken and my soul never crushed

For I am the meanist motherfucker to walk the earth

A gentle heart to care for the lost

And the strength of every demon that's lost to the dark

Fire comes from my eyes and lightening from my speech

Burning you alive and I havn't even thought yet

Just wait till I plot how I'm gonna skin you alive

Hating you is so easy and it keeps me alive, heart beating, soul freeing

Free the spirit that lives under the tree

The tree of sin that saw the fall of man

Well I'm climbing the ladder back up
To be above all those that came before me

The lost bunch so blinded by bullshit things

Give me my war so I may survive

For I feed on the broken lives of causalities

Let the blood run now as I stand on the mountain top

Proclaiming victory, over you, over the world, and even over death

Steel Rain

Coming down like a freight train from hell

The speed goes out before the light

Once you know you're hit you're already dead

Lost in a sea of souls so black and so dark

That you never regain who you are

Losing sight on the facts of life

That it was all a lie to win you to their side

The side of weakness and pitty and guilt

There is no such things in my life anymore

In my weakness I learned hate

And in my pitty I grew in rage

With guilt came revenge

Now I am ready to engage in this life long battle

To hate you is more then to love you

For love only lasts so long in this cold heart

But hatred lasts forever

As I burn you with my eyes

And cast you to pain with my wicked tongue

On lips of eternal bliss mixed with redemption

I speak a judgment greater then any other man

The steel rain falls now on your head and you bleed

Waisting away into nothingness you become like me

A little boy lost in the dark

Well this little boy has a friend in a beast

The most horrid of all creatures he devours souls

And the boy stands on with a smile and a tear

Happy to have a friend for once

Revenge is finally at his fingertips

Ripped from his serenity the boy met his beast in hell

Both locked away they used eachother to be set free

Blowing all away who stand in their way

The beast attacks when the small boy cries

When the monster sees the child bleed

Rage overtakes him and all in the world must die

For friends are hard to come by when ugliness is your name

So the boy and the beast walk hand in hand

As the steel rain falls it doesn't even damp their feet

Immune to the carnage they cause

One is the brain and one is the bran

Vengence is theirs and to them alone

Soon the world will know of their pain

When the light at the end of the tunnel

Suddenly becomes the fires of eternal torment

For in this fire a friendship was born

And in the fire rage was crafted and placed in their hearts

Waiting For The End

Standing in line it moves through eternity

One side the sheep and the other some goats

Eating up all that is in our way

We all play the same fucking games

Stealing hearts that aren't our own

Then wondering why it hurts so bad

We look to find that our hearts are not our own

Now sitting here waiting for death to come

The reaper of souls I know his face

Calling down the sickle on my head

It does not fall even when I pray so hard

Blank eyes stare back from a hooded head

And with a red smile on his face

He says that now is not the time

Hell looks so good right now

Away from the bullshit of this fucking world

At least there I will be warm

With brothers who are just like me

Lost in torment and covered in shame

Skulls of the fallen ones appear and reapper

So many lies none of it matters now

For I am gone and yet waiting for the end

Come and get me I scream to the sky

Turn black and strike me dead

Harden your heart against me my maker

Break me in pieces and scatter me to the wind

What's the use of living without love in your heart?

There is nothing good about life now

So take my life now you bastard and bring me the end

Take It All Back

It was all a lie

From birth till now

I've just found out

That all you fuckers lied to me

Over and over again
There is no forgiveness for this

So take it all back

Everything you ever told me

Breaking down every story told

And reliezing that none of it is truth

Filling my mind with shit

All I know about anything was false

So take it all back
As the fire pours out my eyes

Wishing to consume you all

Who ever opened their mouth to me

Your forked tongues lies

I'm tired of your lying eyes

It's time for you to die motherfucker

For making me always seem wrong

So I spit you out of my mouth

Burning you alive I say

Take back all your fucking lies

Blue Beast

Welcome to the mind of a murderer

Masked in hated and dressed in rage

Blood covers the openings

And tears fill the cracks in his heart

My soul is locked to this fate

A life that is not worth living once seen

Crying out for someone to love me

No seen at all just passed on by

What works out for a man such as I?

Ugly by the worlds eyes and worse by my own

Self hatred in nothing compared to what I really feel

That perfect one will never come

Now as I sit locked in a cage of resentment

This beast becomes blue with woe

Sadness and pitty fill his mind

There will never be any getting back to where I came from

Just like the life I lived so long ago

No one will love me even when I try

So the anger resides and there is no antidote

Pain is the reactions to the drug of lovelessness

For the eyes of all beauty look back in disgust

Trying so hard to be just who I am

Though when I'm not I fall just the same

A perferct muder now takes place

Right inside my heart as I kill myself

Over and over again I hear the words you're not good enough

Just like all the times before

Making a sacrifice I just don't know why the fire will not build

Slottering bull after bull the blood runs wild

Yet no god has answered me, not even the God in me

Silence fills the void and no fingers lace with mine

Making the wait so much worse

Looking into the eyes of those I so wish to love

Though they will never love me why do I still try?

Calling down my own death time and again

This scene of agony is all I know before my eyes

With a bleeding soul and a decaying heart

A soul mate I will not find, not today and not tonight