Depression By Looks In The Eye

Telling me I'm special, telling me I'm right

Telling me I'm somthing that I should never hide

Telling me I'm lovely, telling me I'm grand

Tell me that you love me and that you've left them all behind

I cry for you as I lay down to sleep

Wishing beyond all things to have you in my arms

My love for you well go on into the ends of the world

And you see it and I know you do

Yet you choose to go to him

A man that will never love you the way I do

Depression returns to it's old home by something so sweet

That look in your eyes that says you want me but you don't

Something so bright and yet so dark all at the same time

Bittersweet memories take hold and I begin to pass on

Just another horror story to add to my life

My weakest point you have seen and better yet you've known

Now I come to you and ask for your hand and you turn me away

Confussed and lost I wonder why it is this is happening

And then I remember that I'm just not good enough

I've never fucking been anything worth mentioning

Even the mouths of my own blood kind never spoke well

I was never good for them and I was never ever right

I was always spoken down to like a slave and not a son

Brought to the level of those who take bullets in the brain

Something so wrong has formed my whole fucking life

Stare into my eyes now and tell me there is no pain

Only fires of anger and holes that go down into darkness forever

A depth that no man knows and no one has ever seen

This is me, the broken beaten down man

And you've just added another chapter of failure to my life

Not out of disgust but that it is just me

Just a little boy that you love so much but you will never be mine

Telling me to my face you wish you could have me

But always held back, I may only have you in my dreams

So as the days go one and the old man in me comes about

Those dreams turn to nightmares as you go and leave me behind

I have no drive, I have no demise, I have nothing and it's all I can do

Stuck between life and death forever, I will never be a part of greatness

Held in the arms of someone that really understands

You know me so well yet you still run away

I pray that I would have you and I hope that it works out

But I always fucking know that my prayers fall apart

Speaking emty words to an empty sky and an empty throne

Heard for all other things but when I ask for me there is no amen instore

Cut open and bleeding on the alter I perish into nothing

A metaphore for my life, once living and then blank, all is empty

One trial after another and as of now I've given up

As far as I'm concerned I have nothing to live for, no more life

There is no dulling the pain, I can only vent and where does it get me?

Nowhere fast and falling hard, I run face first into the ground

Smashed and defeated, there is no getting back up from this one

So I am right when I say that I can never break the cycle

What those above me set is forever encased as truth

I will be alone, as nothing, with nothing, for nothing

All because they wanted to control me and make me lame

Deaf and mute I will never escape the cell of my own body

My flesh is so corrupted and there is no getting out

On the floor half dead and counting down to my last heart beat

This depression hits me like a ton of bricks

And all my weakness come running on back

Embracing the life that won't leave my side once and for all

What they all said about me was right

Everything you tell me is based around something that is bigger then a lie

I must destroy all that is left good in me and be the esence of my being

Evil to the max, and nothing less then that

Worthless and past over for that which is so much better

This is my divine judgement, this is my life sentence to death

Shackled to the wall of revenge, someone is getting back at me

Never look me in the face anymore for it only breaks my heart

Demons lay claim to my life and take it as they wish

I am nothing that you say I am, give up on me my sweet

Go back to that one that you speak so much about

Don't ever look back in my eyes